June 9, 2007

Soon End In Joy

As you may have surmised from reading previous posts, music is a very important part of my life. Now, when it comes to performing the Lord definitely did NOT bless me with gifts in this field. With the help of a hoist, a dump truck and a cloud of witnesses surrounding me I can sing well enough for possibly 50% of the population to figure out the tune. With the exception of mucking through the required "recorder" production in the 5th grade (when everyone else in the class was bleating away as well), I've never been able to do anything with an instrument.

So for better or worse, I'm forced to rely on those who have been given gifts in this field to quench my needs. That's okay, because there is a multitude of people in this world who ARE gifted in musical talents.

Music for me, however, has often led the journeys of my soul. In the days before I became a Christian, I desperately sought music that would help me to "find my identity". I often sought out secular artists that would show me as being "cool and yet different from everyone else".

Upon accepting Christ as my Savior, however, I began to realize that music was so much more than being "all about me". I've come to understand that music speaks to each person differently than the next, much as God has created each person differently. I've also come to view musical gifts and talents as being gifts from Him and - like all gifts from our Lord - they carry responsibilities. I believe God created music as a tool for us to worship Him. Again - like all gifts from our Lord - musicians, singers and song writers have the choice as to whether or not to use them in this manner.

As my journey with Him has moved along, I find myself less and less inclined to listen to music that doesn't involve worshipping Him. Yes, my iPod has a few secular songs on it - primarily nostalgic songs that remind me of particular points in my life. The vast majority of music that I listen to, however, is by Christian artists who use their gifts to worship the Lord.

The group of artists whose work has touched me most deeply over the past couple of years is a group called Jars of Clay. They're often labeled as "alternative", so I find it rather ironic that one of their best works has been an album called "Redemption Songs". It is a collection of Jars' interpretation of old hymns.

Now please understand this about me - I really don't care for sitting in a church listening to soe of the old dirges. Having grown up outside of a church setting, I still feel the proper place for an organ is playing "Charge!" or "3 Blind Mice" at a hockey game. On this particular work, however, the artists have taken such old time classics as "It Is Well With My Soul" and "I'll Fly Away" and rearranged them to really strike a chord with modern tastes.

The one that has been touching me most deeply recently is "God Will Lift Up Your Head". This is a song originally written by Paul Gerhardt. I'm not sure when Paul wrote it, but it was translated into English by John Wesley, so it has to be over 200 year old. The lyrics can be viewed here, but I would strongly encourage the reader to stop into a music store or iTunes and listen to it.

http://www.jarchives.com/dgod_will_lift.htm

The verse at the end goes:

Through waves and clouds and storms,
He gently clears the way
Wait because in His time, so shall this night
Soon end in joy, soon end in joy
Soon end in joy, soon end in joy

So I'm listening to this a couple of weeks ago as I'm waiting to board a flight from Atlanta to Portland. "So shall this night, soon end in joy". What are my options here? I either arrive safely home to be with my wife and kids. So shall this night soon end in joy! What happens if the plane goes down? I'll be joining my Lord in Heaven! So shall this night soon end in joy!

I was on a flight several years ago that was that was going through some pretty nasty turbulence, and an image came to my mind of God's hands holding up the wings. The comfort of that image stayed with me for a long time. Now, I'm comforted by "So shall this night soon end in joy."

Music is definitely one of God's gifts to my soul.

May 30, 2007

An Example of God's Grace

Well I still first remember the first time
I felt the power of your kiss
It hit me like a bolt of lightning
I said I never will recover from this
And like the words from the mouth of a prophet
I have lived to see those words come true
Just look at me now, I'm still reeling

With every little kiss I'm reminded
How wonderful it is to be in love with you
With every little look
With every little touch
With every little kiss

Like a moth being drawn to a candle
This is something that I can't resist
I guess you could say I'm addicted
Cause I keep coming back again and again
And after all of the storms we have weathered
All the seasons of change we've been though
Well Somehow the flame keeps getting brighter

With every little kiss I'm reminded
How wonderful it is to be in love with you
With every little look
With every little touch
With every kiss you give me just a little taste of heaven
Just one more good gift that God has given
I don't want to miss one single little kiss

"With Every Little Kiss" by Steven Curtis Chapman

My wife and I recently celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary. 21 years. The entire concept is astonishing to me.

Every time I look at her, I'm amazed that a woman like that would love a man like me. I still experience pangs of fear, that she'll come to her senses and realize that she deserves someone better.

Having her as my life's partner gives me concrete proof of the existence of God. As the revered hymn "Amazing Grace" puts it, "Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me." God loves me in spite of the fact that I'm totally unworthy of that love. Same goes for my wife. In a world where there was no God, this would simply be impossible.

She is my wife, my friend, my confidante, and all things in between. I apologize, but I simply do not have the words to express all that she means to me. I also won't share EVERYTHING she means to me in this venue!

The reason she isn't listed as one of my Mentors is that she means so much more to me than that.

I simply thank my gracious Lord for bringing her into my life!

May 28, 2007

Memories

Wow - it's been a couple of months since I added anything on here. Time flies when you're busy I guess.

I'm approaching one of those milestone moments in life - my 30 year high school reunion. Unfortunately I'm not going to be able to make it to the actual reunion, but it has given me opportunities to re-connect with many of the people I grew up with and went to school with. Looking through a 30 year lense, I realize what a remarkable group of people I was privileged to know.

It also gives me occasion to engage in a little self-relfection. Again through the lense of time, I see a young man who was often very engaged socially and yet frequently lonely. I see a person who could be often bitingly sarcastic and critical of others. I often long to be able to rewind to those days, mark down every hurtful thing I ever said to someone and offer up my profound apologies.

I also carried an inordinate amount of pride, particularly in my "intellect". Decent grades in school came pretty easily, and I was a very strong test taker. I somehow managed to morph that into me being some kind of ivory tower intellectual.

But what did I learn from these things? I've come to know that God has used these experiences to shape the man that I am continuing to become.

Let's start with the self applied "intellectual" label. On this one, I have to go back to one of the "mentors" that I've already posted about - C.S. Lewis. When I read Mere Christianity, one of the clearest realizations I came to was that my so-called intellect was folly. I was not the smartest person around, and knowledge is useless when held up to wisdom. As I've aged, I've noticed that my capacity to absorb more knowledge is diminishing, and I'm fine with that. What I pray for now is wisdom and discernment. I pray that He would help me to make the best decisions I can. I pray that He would help me to grow in my love for Him and for his children. I still have so very far to go.

As far as my penchant for nastiness goes, I still have many miles to go to overcome that. I will say, however, that occasioanally I find myself learning from that as well. Let me tell a little story on that point.

I have a beautiful, delightful daughter. She is currently 13, and has caught the drama bug that infects her Dad. A couple of years ago, we were doing a sketch for one of the church services. The premise of the sketch was 2 guys going out to collect for a food drive. One of them (me) was apprehensive, the other one was trying to show him that things wouldn't be that bad.

The two guys started going up to doors and met several different characters. One of the characters - a young teenage girl who was "punked out", was played by my daughter (she's very tall so can pull off roles older than her actual age).

When we arrived at church that morning, she was dressed in a short black skirt, her hair was colored a bright pink and going in many different directions, she had fishnets on her arms, a ripped sweatshirt and generally looked like a rather "undesirable" teenager. She looked perfect to play the role.

What shocked me, however, was that from the minute we walked in, she started drawing stares. As we got out of the car in the parking lot, a lady drove by throwing eye daggers at her. Many other people within the church - of all ages - gave her disapproving glares as we walked down the hall.

What was going on? Don't you people know my daughter? She's sweet and kind and loves the Lord. She's not a punk! How can you judge people like this?

(Before anyone forms an undeserved impression of our church, it is NOT a stodgy, "everyone dressed to the hilt" type of place. To give you an indication, I tend to wear shorts much of the year, and you see very few suits and ties in the place. I guess it just shows that people are humans wherever you go.)

A still small voice said "Hmm, suppose you ever judge people like that, Dale? Judge them based on looks alone? Automatically pigeon hole them into some category based on their looks or some other characteristic?"

Guilty as charged, Lord.

I'd love to say that I never judge people anymore, but I'd be a bald faced liar. I do find myself checking myself more often, and pray that He continues to open my eyes to my shortcomings.

So for whatever it's worth, I offer a blanket apology to all of those many people I have offended in the past. Please forgive me.

March 25, 2007

Busy busy busy

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is, it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say
From Word of God Speak by MercyMe

Haven't posted too much lately because I've been pretty busy with work. Since I'm a self-employed consultant, being busy with work is necessarily evidence of God's provision in my life. Do I always stop to realize that fact and thank Him? Sadly, no I don't. Of late, however, I definitely have.

So over the past couple of weeks I've been out in Chicago working hideously long days at a grocery distribution center. I flew home Friday night. This morning (Sunday), my son and I are packing up the car and heading out on a college visit road trip to California. We'll get home next Saturday. Next Sunday I get back on a plane for Chicago.

Bear with me folks - life doesn't always allow time for me to post my thoughts, but I have to pay the bills.

March 6, 2007

Kirby in Iraq - Update

For anyone who responded in prayer to my earlier post about Kirby - our former neighbor serving his second tour in Iraq - I want to thank you and to give you an update.

We received an email update from him today. While he spends quite a bit of time "in country" - traveling to different sites in Iraq for his duties - his base of operations is in the Al Faw Palace. I found a link below to give you an idea of the place:

http://midnight.hushedcasket.com/2006/05/26/al-faw-palace-and-aussie-football/

Please continue to pray for him and his family. I'll leave you with the last paragraph of his email:

"Well, need to get back at it. All's well here, and let me reinforce what I have always said... the world is not coming to an end. We have a really tough fight on our hands, and mistakes have been made, but that is the nature of this business. Keep the young kids out here in convoys and kicking down doors in your thoughts."

March 3, 2007

On A Lighter Note - Being a Fan

Some folks who are in regular contact with me have already heard this, but I'm going to write about it nonetheless!

I love football. Well, the professional game doesn't interest me all that much, but I really enjoy watching the local high school play and I've been a very avid University of Oregon Ducks fan for many years. When I was attending the college, the team was pretty pitiful, but I still enjoyed the atmosphere surrounding the games. Their success over the past decade has made it even sweeter. This past season brought an event, however, that stopped me in my tracks.

Oregon played a very highly regarded Oklahoma team and pulled out a victory - a victory aided by a controversial official's call close to the end of the game. Truth be told, this game - like virtually all games - had errors committed by the officials that aided both sides. The controversy, however, exploded across the entire country. Virtually every media outlet discussed it ad nauseum. Fans on both sides overreacted horribly. I don't recall any instances of physical violence, but there were certainly stories of cars being vandalized and many vulgar epithets were thrown back and forth.

It wasn't only the fans of these two teams who were getting in on the action. The following week I received an email from a good friend who happens to be a fan of Oregon's traditional arch rival - Oregon State. He was basically trying to get me to admit that Oregon didn't deserve to win the game, etc.

I responded with an email that was pretty testy in tone. When his reply came back, basically saying "Whoa Nellie!", I knew something was very wrong here.

What would I have done had it been Oregon State in the situation? Yup - I would have been trying to get every OSU fan I knew to admit that they didn't deserve the win. This took me off in a new direction.

What is it about being a fan of a sports team that gives me a right to belittle the fans of other teams? I don't play for the team, in fact I never even played organized football. Yes, I attended the school, but how is it that a victory by "my" team makes me a superior human being to the fan of the other team or teams? Why do I get sullen and depressed when "my" team loses? Why should I let their success of failure have any bearing on my demeanor at all?

When I looked at these questions objectively (or at least tried to), I realized that I had to step back from this obsession. Cheering for a team doesn't make me any better than the next fellow. Letting their success or failure affect my demeanor is so obviously wrong as to be laughable. Will a win by the Oregon Ducks help me to overcome any of my personal challenges? Will it make the world a better place, solve hunger or accomplish anything else beyond swelling the chests of their fans? Of course it won't.

I have held a belief for a very long time that our society is a mirror reflection of ancient Rome. Civilization has changed enough to preclude us from attempting to conquer the known world militarily, but this country has done a pretty effective job of conquering culturally and economically. What are our sporting events if not modern equivalents of the gladiatorial games held in antiquity? Our society - for the most part - has developed beyond the blood lust of those days, but the irrational devotion is very similar.

I could make some kind of analogy of the obsession with my team's success being an addiction like alcoholism. After all, of a former president can be described as addicted to sex, why can't I claim this addiction. Actually, now that I think about it, I rather like the latter comparison. Sex - if practiced within the confines of a marriage and without any truly bizarre behaviors - is wonderful. A person need not abstain from sex to keep it under control.

The same goes for being a sports fan. To say that I'll never watch another game or cheer when my team scores would be foolish and needlessly masochistic. I just have to keep it rational and within the confines of the game!

March 2, 2007

Mentors - Jeff Crosno

We now take a look at the first of my mentors who is still among the living. I've known him for around 15 years now. Our worlds have drawn apart significantly over the past few years, but I still cherish his wisdom. After becoming a Christian - or coming back to Christ, to be more accurate - I was attending a relatively large church - one that my wife had been a member of since she was 10 years old. For roughly my first 10 years there, it would have been considered a "traditional" church - focused on having outstanding preaching, a remarkably talented group of singers (the music tended to be 18th, 19th and early 20th century vintage), and ministries that were focused on taking care of each other. Along came Pastor Crosno. Jeff was a good preacher, but his messages tended to be more practical and less the soaring theological flights taken by his predecessors. Since we were quickly closing in on the 21st century, he also tried to take the music ministry from the 18th century to a blend of the 19th and 20th. That met with some resistance – particularly when the new Music Minister brought in a black gospel group for a Sunday night service!

All of that was well and good, but what impressed me most was that he brought the concept of servanthood to our congregation. Our Lord bowed so low as to wash the feet of his disciples. He fed the hungry and poor, healed those who were afflicted. He reached out to those less fortunate. So, as Christians, are we not supposed to emulate what He did for us? As a church, should we not be reaching out to those in our community who need aid? Of course we should.

I considered Jeff a good friend. When he left to take on another church in a different city, we decided to make a move as well for various reasons. The body of believers that we have found embraces the concept of serving. Is it perfect? Obviously not, but I’ve found that the more a group of Christians concentrates on serving others, the more they WANT to serve others. Hmm. Maybe that’s what Pastor Crosno was trying to tell us.

Jeff also gave me a piece of advice that I hold dear to this day. As mentioned in a previous post, I went from a 5 day a week in the same office corporate job to a position as a consultant for a software company. In case you don’t know, that type of position involves travel. A LOT of travel. When the software company offered me the position, I wanted it. Badly. I mean I REALLY wanted it! But what about the responsibility to my family? At that point I had a 3 year old and a 7 year old at home. I’d be heading out on the road 30-40 weeks a year.

First I talked to Linda. “This is your dream job, Dale. You need to do it.” Still not satisfied – why do men always fail to listen to their wives? – I went to talk to Jeff – as a friend and as a pastor. Trying to cover my bases, however, I phrased it in Christian Speak.

“How do I know if this is God’s will for my life?” (How’s that? Not bad, huh!?)

“Dale, a lot of people get hung up on looking for the ‘green lights’. Is this the direction I’m supposed to go, Lord? Are you sure, Lord? I would suggest you pay more attention to the ‘red lights’. If you are seeking God’s will and delighting in Him - truly committed to Him - He will give you the desires of your heart. If you see a red light – something that tells you that you’ll have to compromise your ethics, values or principles, then you probably shouldn’t go down that path.”

Were there any red lights? Well, being away from home would be tough, but on the weeks when I wasn’t on the road, I’d be home with the family 24/7. How many other people can say that they can be at home 12-22 weeks a year? So that didn’t seem to compromise anything. Other than that, it looked to be all systems go. I’ve never looked back and have never regretted the decision.

As I said, I’ve shared that piece of advice many times – and it is normally received enthusiastically. So thank you Jeff, for giving me some of your insight. Thank you for showing me the value of serving others. Above all else, thank you very much for being a friend.

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him…(Psalm 37:5-7a, NIV).

Mentors - C.S. Lewis

Okay, I figure if Yancey can pull John Donne out of the Middle Ages and credit him as a mentor, I can at least pull a man who lived during my lifetime. I'm not going to delve too deeply into Lewis' personal history - there have been numerous biographies written about the man utilizing much better research than I am capable of. This post will therefore concentrate on the impact Lewis has had on my life.

I actually have to start with a little bit of history on myself. Somewhere in the dark mists of my childhood, I experienced my first realization of my own sins. My parents had a "bank" in the house where they would toss loose coins and some dollar bills, and I broke into the bank and stole most of the money - regaling some friends with candy and soda. I was caught, of course, and spent the rest of the summer trying to figure out ways in which I could repay the money.

Another event happened that summer, however. Some new kids moved in across the street. As I got to know them, they invited me to attend what would today be called a "Backyard Bible School". It was here that I first heard of God's grace through his Son Jesus Christ - that my sins would be forgiven if I would ask Christ into my heart. I was a child who was devastated by guilt, and here was forgiveness for the asking. I asked.

From what I remember, however, the reaction at home wasn't quite so ecstatic! My father forbade me from associating with those kids again. My oldest sister told me how "those people" didn't allow attending movies or anything fun. Apparently I had fallen in amongst members of the Alliance Church of Canada - an evangelical denomination. Oh the horror!

So the boy drifted away from Christ, but when I look back, I realize that Christ did not drift away from me. I became a self-styled agnostic bordering on atheist, but He was always there, keeping me safe, holding me back from getting too deeply involved in a life that would destroy me.

Fast forward about 16 years. I'm once again grappling with the decision to give my life to Christ, or rather give it BACK to Christ. During this process, I was pounding Linda (the woman I've been happily married to for almost 21 years) with all kinds of questions. You see, at this point in my life I saw myself as some kind of intellectual (ah, the folly of youth!). Linda patiently answered many of the questions, but I wouldn't stop. One day - I think out of exasperation - she handed me a book called "Mere Christianity".

For those unfamiliar with it, Mere Christianity actually started out as a series of radio broadcasts that Lewis delivered during World War II. The book requires concentration, but it is written in a style that makes you feel like you're sitting by the fireplace, listening to a man that you very much respect and admire. Lewis calmly took all of the myriad of arguments that I had against Christianity, examined each one, then systematically and logically destroyed it. "Christ was a moral teacher, but He certainly wasn't the Son of God". "Well," Lewis explained "based on what He said, Christ was either the Son of God or a colossal nut case" (I'm paraphrasing). By the end of the book, I realized that the foundation for my unbelief had been removed and I was faced with either accepting Him as my Savior or living the rest of my life in a lie that was out there for all the world to see.

So Christ - the Hound of Heaven - pursued me for years and finally caught me. Or did I catch Him? Doesn't really matter either way. Lewis was able to break through my pseudo-intellectual veneer and help me to realize the truth.

In the years since, I have also enjoyed many of Lewis' other books. The Great Divorce is an entertaining, thought provoking suggestion of what Heaven might be like. The Problem of Pain grapples with - well - the problem of pain. (As a quick aside, Lewis also had someone whose writings impacted him - GK Chesterton. Chesterton pointed out that as big as the problem of pain is for Christians, the problem of pleasure is even more insurmountable for an honest atheist). Lewis' The Screwtape Letters was not only wonderful entertainment, it also provided me with a character for one of my first acting performances.

I know that my beady little brain has no comprehension of what Heaven will be like. I do know, however, that I am very much looking forward to meeting this man in person when I get there.

February 28, 2007

Dealing with "Thank you"

If you're reading this post, chances are pretty good that you know me. Even if you don't, if you read my profile, you'll notice that I include "amateur actor" as one of my descriptions.

I don't have ANY professional experience in acting. As a matter of fact, the only acting "class" I've ever had are a couple of different workshops put on by the Dramatic Arts Pastor at our church. It's a passion that I didn't even discover within until I was in my 30's.

So what makes me think I have any talent in the craft? Frankly, I don't. I've played roles ranging from the Apostle Thomas to Screwtape, from a middle aged bachelor living with his bachelor brother to Ezekiel. I've acted in front of audiences ranging in age from pre-schoolers to adults and in size from rooms of 10 to 1500 people. Through it all - every single time I walk onto the stage, I experience a feeling of "How in the world did YOU end up doing this?"

Please understand that I am not trying to convey a message that I'm some sort of Oscar winning talent. I don't believe that in the least. I am constantly amazed whenever someone walks up to me and praises my work. Even when that happens, I often get the feeling that "they're just trying to make me feel better". In our church community, however, they keep asking me to play roles, so maybe - just maybe - there's something there.

Which brings me back to the topic of this post. From a Christian perspective, how does an artist respond when someone walks up to them and tells them that their work is fantastic or simply says "Thank you"?

Our society is permeated, marinated and contaminated by celebrities and wannabes. I'm convinced that it is impossible to go through a day without hearing about some superstar actor, rock star, model or someone who is famous for nothing (Paris Hilton & Anna Nicole Smith come to mind). These people are constantly barraged with awards, praise and down right groveling. Some of them have worked very hard at their craft. Others have stumbled into stardom. Regardless of how they got there, they deal constantly with people who are worshipping them.

The Body of Christ - at least in the US - also has its celebrities. Christian musicians ranging from the Gaithers to Switchfoot have brought contemporary music back to what music was meant to be - a method of glorifying God. While there are relatively few major scandals within the Christian music industry (relatively being the key word here), I know that many of these artists struggle with the fame associated with their success. One of the more successful of these groups was DC Talk. They wrote a song that I believe should rattle through the brain of every Christian performer whenever they're about to walk on stage:

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/d/d.c.+talk/what+if+i+stumble_20037744.html

All of this leads up to my original intent in writing this post: How do I respond when someone comes up to me after a performance and says "That was fantastic" or "That really touched my heart" or simply "Thank you"? Although I have absolutely zero musical talent, I know the musicians have to deal with this as well - since I've gone up and said those things to them on a regular basis.

So how DO I respond to it? And, better yet - How SHOULD I respond to it?

To begin with, I've developed my own way of thanking the performers. "Thank you so much for using God's gifts to glorify Him". To me that is acknowledging where the gift comes from and what it was meant to be used for. It also acknowledges, however, the excitement any artist should feel at being blessed with those gifts.

When someone comes up to me and says "You were great", however, I get really uncomfortable and even want to squirm out of the situation. I KNOW that what happens on that stage would be a disaster if God wasn't in control of it. I immediately want to launch into an explanation of this for the person addressing me, but when you're standing in the foyer of the church and hundreds of people are milling about and past you, it's not particularly easy to do that. I suppose I could say something like "It's all Him - I had nothing to do with it", but I fear that this would come across as rejecting their compliment - something that we're far too well trained at.

I have a recent example of what I'm talking about here. When someone asks me to pray for them, I've developed a habit of typing the prayer out and emailing it to them. I also launch "sneak attacks" on occasion where I'll send these prayers to folks who didn't necessarily ask for them. I recently sent one of these to a man in our church who is being considered for a position of church elder.

Apparently the "e-prayer" meant a lot to him. He sent me a wonderful response and then returned the "sneak attack" by coming up to me in the church foyer a couple of weeks ago to thank me and tell me how much he appreciated it. As I'm standing there listening to him, I go into absolute panic mode. "What do I say to this? How do I respond?" I'm very much afraid I came across as a blithering idiot, and that he now thinks that there's no way this guy could have written that prayer!

So I'm in a huge quandary. I usually fall back to a simple "Thank you" or "No - thank YOU" or something equally inane.

In an effort to generate some interaction with this blog, I'd invite other folks' thoughts on this. I know of a couple of artists (even using that label on myself feels weird) who've visited this, so PLEASE share!

February 13, 2007

My Friend Heading to Iraq

I received an e-mail Sunday from a dear friend that is heading back to Iraq for his second tour. Kirby's wife Linda, and their two sons remain behind in Ohio. Kirby had retired from the US Navy prior to the events leading to this war, but has offered his knowledge and service to our country in time of need. This morning I would like to post my prayer for them.

Our gracious and magnificent Lord, You are El-Shaddai - the God All Sufficient. You are all that we need, the source of all of our hope. I praise Your incredible grace to us!

Father, this morning I lift my brother Kirby to You. He is - once again - serving his fellow countrymen by going into the war zone. Protect him Father. I pray that You would surround him with Your protective embrace and let him know that You are there with him. Oh Lord, this man and his wife was there for my family when the tragic events of 9/11 occured and I was caught on the other side of the country. I am forever grateful for this. They were used by You when I was not available. Bless them, oh mighty Jehovah!

This morning I ask that You preserve and protect him and his family through the coming year. Keep him out of harm's way, Father. Bring him home safe, and help him to know that in spite of the things said by some in our society, his service is deeply appreciated.

Lord, I also plead Your comfort for Linda, Gabriel and Jacob. This will be a difficult time for Linda as she raises their sons on her own for a year. I pray your provision for them. I pray that You would grant her the patience and strength she needs. Comfort her in Kirby's absence and show her Your love. My blessed Father, Gabriel is thrust into being the "young man of the house". Show him how to help his mother through these times. Help him to deal with his own fears while patiently comforting his brother. Jacob is very young, Lord, and his understanding of this situation is undoubtedly limited, but I pray that You would help him in ways that none of us can foresee or understand.

These requests come from the bottom of my heart in the incredible name of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, Your Son.

Amen

February 10, 2007

Mentors - Ben Padrow

About halfway through Soul Survivor, I realized that I HAD to look back at my life on those who impacted it significantly. I had no choice - nobody lives in a bubble and everyone that I encounter has some sort of influence on me. It's just the way humans work.

So who would be number 1? That question was answered very quickly in the memory of Dr. Ben Padrow.

I began my college career at the University of Oregon. Like most kids coming out of high school, I had some vague idea of where I wanted to go and what I wanted to be. In this case, the kid thought he wanted to be a lawyer. I guess I spent too many hours watching Perry Mason or something. That illusion evaporated before the end of my freshman year, however, and I then drifted off into various directions - political science (I bombed in an American Government class) journalism (couldn't pass the typing test) and some others that I have since completely forgotten. While attending school, I was working part time at a logging equipment junk yard. When I got laid off (this was the early 80's when we were still enduring the Nixon/Ford/Carter economy), I decided to take a year off school, find some work and then return.

To make a long story short, after my year off I ended up at Portland State University. In my first term, I happened to take a course in Public Speaking. It was there that I met Ben Padrow.

If someone were to look at Ben and I standing in the hall talking, they'd think it was a pretty odd combination indeed. I was a relatively large young man, standing 6'2" and built like a football lineman. Padrow, as I've always liked to describe him, was a "5 foot tall, half blind Jew". 5 foot might be a bit of an exaggeration, but not much - he couldn't have stood over 5'2". He wore glasses whose lenses seemed to be about an inch thick. While unabashedly Jewish, he wasn't orthodox and encouraged me a great deal as I embarked on my journey towards accepting Christ as my Savior.

I didn't realize it when I signed up for the class, but Ben Padrow was an icon around the Portland State Campus. Portland State (originally the Vanport Extension Center) was started up after World War II to help deal with all of the returning soldiers who were attending college on the GI Bill. The school gradually developed into Portland State College, but one event in 1965 propelled this school into national and state prominence, which led to accreditation as a university. That event was the 1965 College Bowl team.

In this day and age of Trivial Pursuit and non-stop glitz on TV, it is difficult to imagine something like the College Bowl. Teams of students from 2 different colleges would face off in, well, trivia contests, the winner advancing to the next round. Padrow took on the PSU team, and the article below shows the results.

http://media.www.dailyvanguard.com/media/storage/paper941/news/2005/03/08/News/They-Returned.Heroes-2614258.shtml?sourcedomain=www.dailyvanguard.com&MIIHost=media.collegepublisher.com

With that feather in his cap, Padrow started down a path of politics. Padrow coached Bob Packwood in his campaign against US Senator Wayne Morse in 1968. Packwood came across as the fresh young fighter while Morse stayed the stodgy old timer. Packwood took the seat and held it until his resignation years later.

Padrow then moved on to a position on the Multnomah County Commission for 4 years. Perhaps his biggest accomplishment in politics, however, was managing Bud Clark's campaign for mayor of Portland in 1982. Clark's victory was one of the biggest surprises in Oregon political history. Here's a brief article about that event.

http://www.wweek.com/html/25-1984.html

As I was researching I also found that Padrow was a central character in a movie about the life of Richard Pimentel. Here's a link for a brief description of "The Music Within"

The Music Within
http://www.melissageorge.co.uk/films/musicwithin.htm

Padrow had many other accomplishments and roles in his life, including Executive Director of the Lake Oswego Community Theater, of all things.

Ben Padrow was in many ways what you would consider the consumate "behind the scenes man". As the descriptions above show, he spent much of his life helping to shape other people's lives. In the 25 years since I graduated from Portland State, I've encountered several people that attended his classes. Every last one of them has stated at least a small amount of admiration for the man.

When I first landed in one of his classes, the man encouraged me. He told me that I was actually a good speaker. He also managed to convey to me just how important the concept of communication actually is. "You cannot not communicate" was one of his famous sayings. I met the woman who would become my wife in one of his classes. He inspired me to declare the study of communications as my major and helped develop a devotion to the art that continues to this day.

Perhaps the strongest contributions he made to my life, however, was to deliver wake up calls. As I said above , I met Linda in one of his classes, and at times it seemed like he was cheer leading our developing relationship. We met, however, in my third term of taking "speaking" classes from him.

As I said, he had told me that I was actually a good speaker. He encouraged me to keep taking speaking classes. The next term, however, Linda took her first speaking class from him. At the end of the term, Padrow was reviewing the class with her and told her "You're one of the best natural speakers I've ever heard. You don't need to take any more speaking classes." Talk about injecting a huge dose of humility directly into my veins!

The other wake up call was delivered as I was completing my final term prior to earning my degree. Suffering from a severe case of "senioritis", I was casting about looking for a direction to aim myself. At this point I sat down in Ben's office for a chat.

"I'm thinking about continuing the study of communications and studying for my Masters." I told him.

Padrow looked up at me through those thick glasses. He shook a yellowed finger at me and said "I think you need a kick in the ass and should get out there and find a job." He was right of course. This is something that you would expect a parent to say to someone, but it carried a lot of weight coming from him.

I did get out there and found a job. The jobs at first were menial, but they gradually improved. Somehow he helped to convey to me that studying communications and life in general had much more to do with experiencing it than it did reading it in books.

Ben Padrow helped to instill in Linda and I a love for the art of communication, and that art has become one of the key foundations of our marriage, second only to our faith in Christ. Since much of my life now - from teaching classes in using business systems to amateur acting - revolves around the concept, I can honestly say that I used much of what I learned in college.

I attended Ben's funeral a few years after I graduated. I was deeply saddened that from this point on, there would not be any more students at Portland State who would have the benefit of his insight and knowledge. As I looked around the room at the incredible crowd of people, however, I realized I was wrong. His legacy will undoubtedly live on at that school for years to come.

Books

As a child, I used to get in trouble for staying up way too late reading. I'd devour pretty much anything I could get my hands on. My family used to tease me unmercifully for the fact that I read an entire set of childrens encyclopedias.

You notice that you hardly ever even SEE childrens encyclopedias - or any encyclopedias - any more? I suppose they are one of the clearest casualties of the computer/internet revolution. How can one justify the expense of printing an enormous set of books that are meant to hold information when that information is obsolete before the books roll off the presses? I still love to pick up a good book and while away the hours losing myself in it, but anytime I'm looking for "reference" type information, I go straight to the internet.

Anyway, by far the best book that I've read in the past year is called Soul Survivor by Philip Yancey. Yancey is a former editor of the Christianity Today magazine, but while definitely a Christian, he comes with some unique perspectives. He describes himself as a "survivor of church abuse", having grown up in a staunchly fundamentalist and quite racist church in the South.

This book, however, is a journey that I found fascinating and cause for some personal soul searching. Soul Survivor is an exploration of 13 "mentors" that Yancey credits with helping him in his walk through faith and through life. These mentors range from Martin Luther King, Jr. to Mahatma Ghandi, from John Donne to Dr. Paul Brand and GK Chesterton. Some of his "takeaways" would surprise you.

Personally, the primary impact that this book has had on me was to encourage me to look over my own life at those who've had a significant impact on my walk. Rather than making this one long post, I'll devote individual posts to specific individuals.

February 9, 2007

The Great Adventure

Okay, why "The Great Adventure"? It's the title of a song by Steven Curtis Chapman, and the chorus goes like this:

"Saddle up your horses
We've got a trail to blaze
Through the wild blue yonder
Of God's amazing grace
Let's follow our Leader
Into the glorious unknown
This is the life like no other
This is The Great Adventure"

Back in 1996, I was working a typical corporate job that was going nowhere - FAST. As a matter of fact, it had been going nowhere fast for 13 years! I had been searching for a new career path, but kept coming up with the big zilch.

On a trip home from the in-laws, we were listening to this song. When we got home and checked messages, I found out that the company that I had been working for had been bought out and that all of us corporate schmucks were going to be eliminated. I held my wife in my arms and we prayed:

"Okay Lord, this is the Great Adventure. We have no idea where you're taking us or what I'll be doing - it's the glorious unknown. We know, however, that You will provide for us."

Provide He did. Two days later I received a phone call from a software company, offering me a consulting position. After 6 years of that, I joined 2 other guys to form our own consulting firm. The journey continues, and I don't know where it's going from here, but I'm there for the ride!

Now before you get the idea that I think my entire idea of "The Great Adventure" is all about work, please understand that He provides opportunities and experiences in all other aspects of my life as well. Raising and watching my two kids grow up has been an incredible experience and - yes, it has definitely been an adventure as well. My relationship with my wife continues to be an adventure, and traveling all over allows me to meet so many different people - each another opportunity for a relationship adventure.

There's one other aspect of my life where The Great Adventure has played out - drama. As I've laid out in another post, it seems God has given me some talents and abilities in this area - as well as a very strong desire to engage in it. Little did I know that when asked to play the Apostle Thomas in an Easter program several years ago that drama would become such an integral and important part of my life. God has used my good friend Terry to tap me for many roles as well as allowing me to work alongside him in writing and directing.

So I guess one of the biggest take-aways from all of this is that I've come to realize that following God is not some task that I can schedule in a Blackberry, but rather an often spontaneous, sometimes exciting and always adventurous journey.

Saddle up your horses!

Here we go

So I'm thinking today - "I occasionally have something that I want to write down for posterity, maybe (a REALLY BIG maybe) someone else might be interested". So there you have it!

Coming in future posts - who is writing this and why in the world did he name this blog "The Great Adventure"?